Dear man.
If a woman always says yes to your requests for sex, it’s not a good sign.
Not for you.
Not for your relationship.
Not for her.
Why?
It likely means one of three things:
She uses sex to secure the relationship.
She wants to please you.
She is afraid of your reaction.
None of these come from genuine desire. There is no pleasure in this picture.
And if you wish she wanted sex more often, consider this:
Desire for physical intimacy comes from within—body, hormones, emotions. Female arousal works very differently from yours. What’s on the surface for you runs deep inside for her—both physically (penis vs. vagina) and psychologically.
Do you need sex to feel emotionally connected?
Or do you need to feel emotionally connected before wanting sex?
Neither is wrong, but women often fit into the second category. And if you want her to want sex—rather than just giving in—you need to start doing what works.
Someone joked:
When a woman wants to have sex, she can just "eat."
When a man wants sex, he needs to "cook" first.
Not fair?
Well, there is no “fairness” when it comes to the nature.
And some parts of us will always be ruled by deeply rooted instincts and our unique and perfect hormonal “storms”. No matter how spiritual, smart, or evolved we are. As long as we are in our physical bodies....
There is a lot of beauty in it. And messiness, too.
You can’t reason with a cat to stop acting like a cat. But you can understand its instincts and learn how to bond in a way that works.
The same applies to our bodies.
Our hearts.
Our relationships.
So:
Stop assuming she experiences desire the way you do.
Stop pressuring or luring her into sex.
Stop taking her lack of desire personally.
Start learning about her.
Ask questions.
Be curious.
Observe.
Remove the pressure.
Stay grounded.
Stay in your heart.
And let her come to you.
With love and appreciation for all men,
Zhanna.
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